Welcome to my first post, on my first blog!
So, to give some background, I am the other half of the Kinky Duo. Some of you may already be familiar with my spouse Jessica, and if not, please check out her blog: My Own Kinky.
As for me, I won't go too much into detail right off the bat, but I am a healthy adult male who enjoys exploring his sexuality. I've recently began to crossdress, as well as discover my bisexuality. Part of my self discovery, and Jessica sharing in my discoveries, resulted in us being in an open relationship. So, I thought I too would do some blogging, so I could share my thoughts here on all sorts of topics, whether my sexuality, our relationship, or anything else that strikes my fancy.
I've never been in an open relationship before, and it's been an interesting experience so far. I won't pretend we haven't had a few little issues here and there, since it's new to both of us. Overall, I would say it's been very positive so far though!
I think one of the primary benefits to our arrangement is trust. For various reasons, both Jessica and I had trust issues with each other prior to our agreement. One would think that entering into an open relationship would only magnify those issues, but I think the reality is opposite.
Think about it like this: Before, if she were hanging out with a guy friend, especially if it went late into the night, I would sit at home, staring out the window, thinking to myself "what if she's got his cock in her mouth right now?". Or, I'd think about her bent over his coffee table, taking a rough pounding. Naturally, this would upset me. Not because I didn't think it was hot (I've always been turned on by the idea of her getting fucked by other people and sucking other cocks). I'd be upset because when she came home finally, I would never know if it actually happened. She would say no if I asked her, but how would I know that's the truth? Perhaps if we fully trusted each other I would be able to know, but I'm by nature a person who has a hard time trusting, and we'd both done things to damage each other's trust previously.
So now, we have an open relationship. If she goes to hang out with a guy friend of hers, I sit home wondering if his cock is in her mouth, or up her ass. But there's a big difference this time. Most of the time, she'd tell me before she does anything. At a minimum, I now know she'll tell me when she gets home, and while she's telling me, I'll be fucking her. Now, we can both share in the experience, because we both think it's hot. Hell, maybe she'll text me or call me while she's getting fucked.
The point is, I have no reason not to trust her now, because she has no reason to lie to me about it. She knows it would turn me on if I find out she was sucking her friend off. She knows I wouldn't have a problem with it, and she knows that it'll just provide fuel for our own sexual fires.
On the other side, having that freedom is pretty amazing. Knowing I can fuck someone, or suck someone off, or whatever else I want, and she'll not only be accepting, but will enjoy and get turned on by it, is very liberating. Why should I be jealous any more of what she does, when I'm free to do the same thing? I can flirt, and sext, and talk dirty with anyone I want, any time I want, anywhere I want. It's the ultimate freedom.
People make jokes and say "Oh man, you're getting married, only one pussy for the rest of your life!". They say that because they think that's the biggest drawback to being in a relationship. But in ours, that doesn't apply. I can walk down the street, holding Jessica's hand, and ogle any hot chick I see. I've turned to her and said "I'd love to fuck her", and she didn't smack me, didn't roll her eyes, didn't get upset. You know what she did? She grinned and said "I'd love to see that!".
Find me another guy that wouldn't love that response and I'll find you a liar.